Pie in the Sky: Pizza Pirate Impersonated Popular Miami Restaurant, Police Claim

A man accused of duping tourists near Miami International Airport by posing as a popular pizzeria was arrested this week after striking a hotel clerk with his Camaro following a delivery, police say.

Jose Marti-Alvarez, 55, allegedly distributed fraudulent pizzeria flyers to hotel rooms along NW 36th Street, advertising "Roman Cuisine Pizzeria," which misled people into thinking they were ordering from local restaurant Romans Pizzeria, according to Miami Springs police.

On Sunday, a 28-year-old Days Inn front desk clerk told authorities she called 911 after she was hit in "the pelvic area" when she stood behind Marti-Alvarez's car.

Marti-Alvarez told police he had argued with a hotel employee and left the area in haste. "But I don’t think I hit her with my car," he said, according to the police report (attached below).

The real Romans Pizzeria was honored last April by Town of Medley council members and other area officials on its 40th anniversary. The pizzeria made waves in 2022 when it received a positive review from Barstool Sports founder and pizza aficionado Dave Portnoy. 

"This is football pizza," said Portnoy after sampling Romans pizza. "It's a solid 7.4. The crust is a 7.8."

Jesus Roman, owner of Romans Pizzeria, told police he "had been receiving multiple complaints recently from customers who claimed they ordered food, based on the flyers." The "fraudulent activity" led to a stream of grievances, including "poor quality of food" and delivery drivers who "did not return with change" after being paid in cash, the police report says.

One Google reviewer echoed the sentiments, saying a local pizzeria under the Roman moniker overcharged her, botched her order, and sold her chicken soup that tasted like "warmed up Campbell's soup." When she called to complain, the delivery service hung up on her twice.

"Opened food and totally wrong sub. Got a nasty burnt smashed BLT instead of Philly cheesesteak? WTH, how do you get those mixed up? And no salad dressing for my salad," the review reads.

After being read his rights, Marti-Alvarez "admitted that he has been creating and distributing fraudulent flyers for approximately ten years and knows it is illegal to pass out flyers with a fake business name," police say.

It is unclear where the bogus pizzas were made, and whether proper hygiene protocols were followed. Health inspections are required of businesses selling food to the public.

A Google Maps search of the "home" address that Marti-Alvarez gave police appears to show a cafeteria near a railroad crossing in an Allapattah warehouse district.

Marti-Alvarez was released from Turner Guilford Knight Correctional Center on Tuesday after posting a $5,000 bond. He is scheduled to be arraigned on September 17. He faces a charge of aggravated battery and organized scheme to defraud.

For what it's worth, an author at Barstool Sports (who's not a legal expert) questioned whether Marti-Alvarez deserved criminal charges.

"Serving dog-shit pizza and using the word Roman in the name of your business is not a crime in itself," reads the Barstool Sports hot take.

When New Times called Marti-Alvarez's number, a man answered in Spanish and said, "You have the wrong number."

When told this was the phone number given to police in connection with the arrest, the man yelled, "Pizza, pizza, Miami!"

New Times asked where the pizza delivered to area hotels was prepared, to which he responded,  "The police took my oven."

Then he hung up.