Take Scott Glenn, for instance. Now 85, he stars as Vince Vaughn's crusty, manatee-nurturing dad in the Apple TV+ hit Bad Monkey, a show so committed to the Florida of it all that it has enlisted a score of hipster artists to cover Tom Petty songs for its soundtrack.
But let's rewind some 45 years to when Glenn starred in another hit — this being the film Urban Cowboy. A hot Houston honky-tonk vehicle for John Travolta and Debra Winger, Glenn played the hunky bad guy who tried to foil their romance and a whole lot more.
After watching a ripped Glenn wear the shit out of a mesh shirt with a black cowboy hat to match, it's a wonder Winger (or Travolta, for that matter) didn't flip to the dark side.
Next, our time machine takes us to 1950s Africa. Only it's not really 1950s Africa; it's a Taylor Swift video filmed there in the mid-aughts. Here, the famously blonde pop star finds herself cast as an actress in a raven-haired wig, ogling — and then canoodling with — her co-star in the period film, portrayed by Scott Eastwood.
He's so tall and handsome as hell. The lines between the professional and personal blur. His hands are in her hair; his clothes are in her room. But the relationship ends, and by the end of "Wildest Dreams," it appears as though they are never (ever) getting back together.
Having fun yet? Then let's rejoin Glenn in the late-'90s, starring opposite Clint Eastwood in Absolute Power, in which a thief played by Dirty Harry witnesses Glenn's Secret Service agent killing the president's mistress. There's no need to delve further into the plot; the important parts here are that Eastwood is Scott Eastwood's father, Scott Glenn and Scott Eastwood have the same first name, they're both tall and handsome as hell, and that at least one of them now stars in a very buzzy television series set in the Sunshine State.
These loosely connected paths, traversing nearly half a century on an invisible string, all lead back to Swift because pretty much everything does these days. (As Swifties will attest, no fan theory is too implausible to be attached to the Queen of Pop.) And Swift, whose nearly two-year-long, culture-consuming Eras Tour reaches its final fall leg with three shows at Hard Rock Stadium starting October 18, seems as rooted in Florida as any non-native has ever been.
The shitstorm down in Texas
The genre-jumping singer Post Malone may have moved to Texas as a young boy, but just look at the guy — the panhandle might as well use his nose as the Gulf in a facial tattoo.Fittingly, then, there's Posty, sheltered by a phone booth in what could best be described as a Floridian downpour in the video for his "Fortnight" collaboration with Swift, pleading with her to "move to Florida" to "buy the car you want."
Swift joins the second time through this coda, shouting, "Florida!" In the background, before the song draws to a close. Known for putting emphasis on a word or phrase in one song that's the title of another on the same album (the scattered utterances of "cardigan" on Folklore represent one such prior example), all roads, in this instance, lead directly to "Florida!!!"
Why the three exclamation points and seven thunderclap drumbeats while the state's name is sung in the song? Maybe because Florida's a little extra — where the East Coast meets the Deep South and all points in between. While there's a certain archetypal vibe that artworks like Bad Monkey adroitly depict, Florida is also a place capable of morphing into anything for anyone, in which to be hidden or rediscovered.
Look no further than the bridge of "Florida!!!" — which features a marvelously flammable vocal contribution from Florence Welch — for affirmation of this interpretation:
I need to forget, so take me to FloridaYes, there's a cute mention of "a timeshare down in Destin" elsewhere in the song, but, more intriguingly, Swift/Welch are in Florida to "wait out the shitstorm down in Texas."
I've got some regrets, I'll bury them in Florida
Tell me I'm despicable, say it's unforgivable
At least the dolls are beautiful, fuck me up, Florida
I need to forget, so take me to Florida
I've got some regrets, I'll bury them in Florida
Tell me I'm despicable, say it's unforgivable
What a crash, what a rush, fuck me up, Florida
It's one hell of a drug
It's one hell of a drug
Love left me like this and I don't want to exist
So take me to Florida
Malone grew up in Texas, where Urban Cowboy takes place. Make what you will of that, Swifties.
